Dear Empath, You ARE the Norm

The number of people associating themselves with the word “Empath” is on the rise. Being an empath means you are “someone who psychically feels the emotions, feelings, energy and even thoughts of others.”

I love that there are more of us realizing this ability within ourselves; yet there seems to be a negative connotation that comes along with it.

Many Empaths tend to view it as some type of diagnosis of an illness and then use it as an excuse for the way they are or to justify negative health behaviors.

The current perspective around what it means to be an Empath is doing more harm than good. Most resources for Empaths out there make it sound like an illness, teaching you how to cope and survive.

Being an Empath shouldn’t be something you have to cope with. It is a beautiful, powerful gift that can be refined and utilized.

It’s not too far off from what makes a Superhero. Think about most superheroes: when they start to realize they are different it’s usually because of some type of heightened sensitivities. They are extra sensitive!

So are Empaths.

In the beginning, a superhero’s power and sensitivities are raw and untamed. Same with the Empath. The goal for both is to refine their gifts and to utilize them for the greater good.

Sure, it’s still challenging. Sure it can feel like a burden or heavy weight on your shoulders, but that doesn’t mean it’s some type of sickness that you need a cure for. You’re just on your journey figuring out who you are and who you want to be, just like everyone else.

When I first started doing healing work I thought I would end up like some stoic monk, walking around never getting triggered, always calm, always acting unphased by what was going on around me...I was wrong.

The more I healed and opened up, the more sensitive (Empathic) I became. It finally hit me one day that perhaps this is my natural state — the state that a human should be in when they’ve healed most of their blocks and emotional walls.

I’ve opened up my sensitivities, I allow myself to feel, and now I can use that to create. That’s when I realized everyone is an Empath — we all have the capacity for empathy and picking up on subtle energies. It’s only a matter of our openness to and awareness of it.

It’s a gift I would never give back; being able to feel so deeply into things, being able to experience the beauty of the world, the love of my family, the love of The Universe.

It’s incredible, I’ve never experienced joy like this ever before. Before I opened up to my Empathic nature, I numbed it… I was closed off to the negative feelings so I couldn’t feel the positive feelings either.

To open ourselves up to the beauty of this world we must start with the dark. Start with the pain, sorrow, guilt, shame. That’s why you’ve closed yourself off in the first place; it’s what an Empath is trying to avoid when they think they need to “survive” their true nature. To open and refine your Empath nature, you must feel that side of you. It will make the other side infinitely brighter.

So although I agree with many strategies for Empaths about creating boundaries, avoiding certain people and environments, grounding practices, etc., I think the main and best way to “deal with being an Empath” is by feeling through it. Pretty much the opposite of what most of us have done, trying to avoid the feelings because they’re too intense.

Well guess what, you can handle it! Feel it all! Feel your way into the honing of your gifts.

Feel and transform the energies you’re picking up. Instead of “Oh no, I’m starting to feel this yucky feeling, how do I make it go away?”, ask yourself “What am I feeling and why? How can I transform this?”

Part of being an Empath is processing and transmuting energies from the Collective, individuals, and the environment. Do your job ;) Because you don’t have much of a say in the matter.

If you feel pain and sorrow, then grieve. If you feel anger and hatred, then form compassion. If you feel loneliness, then reach out and touch the heart of another.

Use what you feel to create. Create art, poetry, music, ideas, a business, or anything you may enjoy. For me, I’ve been using poetry and have written one just for you at the bottom of this article.

Take the negative energy you feel and turn it into something positive to send back out into the world.

Basically, as an Empath you are a walking vortex. To keep the energies from sticking to you, you can’t just avoid them or send them away, you must process it. With a little practice this will all happen naturally. You become synchronized and harmonious with all that is around you.

Things will flow through you and you won’t have to sit and intentionally process it. You won’t have to be a hermit.

Don’t judge the energies you feel from around you and other people. Don’t call people toxic. Just feel, allow, and release the transformed energy. Somehow you’ve invited that energy in, so it relates to you somehow and it’s your gift that will allow you to utilize that energy for good.

So empath, I invite you to feel through your gifts. To hone them and use them to create beauty all around you. That is your job and there’s no changing it at this point, so embrace it.

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society”

Many empaths have it backwards. The idea is not to make yourself well adjusted to those who are less “feeling” around you. YOU ARE THE NORM.

Don’t try to be like everyone else who are numbed to their senses. They should be the ones looking up to you, striving to be more like you instead of you trying to fit in with them and survive in their world. Share your feelings openly, cry in public, be passionate, care deeply, offer help when you’re picking up on someone having a bad day. SET THE BAR. You are the normal one, the healthy one. Do what those around you won’t do. Be vulnerable, love fiercely, feel pain (yours and theirs).

You need not cope with being an empath. You simply must BE EMPATHIC. That’s the whole point.

Next time you need a reminder of your true nature as an Empath, read this poem I wrote for you:

"Dear Empath"

Dear empath,

I know

I know what it’s like

to be misunderstood

I know what its like

to be happy, yet feel such sadness

I know what its like

to be one of many, yet feel so alone

I too know what it’s like

to carry the pain of the world

But Dear empath,

This is just one side of the coin

Because I know

I know what it’s like

to be one with the Beloved

I know what it’s like

to love without limits

I know what it’s like

to be free from suffering

I know what it’s like

to let go of it all

Dear empath,

I invite you

to rise

I invite you

to feel your way into bliss

I invite you

to feel into that pain

For you will birth purpose

I invite you

to feel what she feels

So you may have compassion

I invite you

to feel into your life

For you will feel just fine